Are you sure he dumped you (or that you dumped him)? My ex narc (45) left me for a (30) whom he claim were just friends. Which I do believe that part. So why wouldnt he consider it might be the girlfriend who has been chasing him for 17 years, who might want to make me look like doing it so that she can keep in in line and away from my house? I say that now he divorced me I was his 3rd wifeI was suckered into the same trap as others in the reading. One night, he was supposed to come to my house after I got off from work and he took so long, I texted him to cancel because I had plans for the next day. If I called, he never answered. And then I feel sad. Never did he say he was sorry or acknowledge that these arguments could be because he didnt respect me, he would tell me that Im upset for no good reason. They are dangerous to your soul. precisely. he needs protecting .get a stable income or if on welfare provide evidence of your not struggling and budgeting for u and child. KNOW YOUR WORTH. I knew my narc for many years in the City we live in. By K Petro/Shutterstock. Its all about evil versus good they are evil , they want what you have and they cant have it they resent you for it and thankfully too stupid to realize that kids grow up and see things quite clearly. my narcissitic ex also it is addicted to porn and on line dating sites, he lied to me also about it and he cant not accepted, but I know his addiction to porn, also he had been trying to always find his perfetct match but never find it, I had been hurt so many times, and he promissed me to change and all that, same thing we got engaged and after 3 weeks living together he started locking himself on the computer room and getting so mad and defensive when I questioned what he was doing there I turned back to my hometown and I hope to never hear from him again. Our results suggest that having high levels of narcissistic admiration A form of narcissism that is agentic and about actively seeking admiration through charm makes breakups easier. After 9 month of nocontact I sent him an email reqesting to talk. So. 5 days later, she messages me and says send me a dirty pic of yourself. Such doubt is rarely "on display, though to the astute observer in various situations its clearly betrayed. After 36 years I finally broke free. When you add that less than 1 in 100 people have an NPD then its clear this label is being used to manipulate people. Old Medication, New Use: Can Prazosin Curb Drinking? A show of power is designed to force you into a position of subservience you will ask for forgiveness, heap praise upon them, and provide a source of supply. . For a lack of time and space here. Some people have had to get retraining orders, to keep people away, do what you have to.They dont always give up so easily, most dont. I have been trying to get a divorce for over a year now from my N and though there are many reasons why the process is taking so long, he has moved back in with his mother and has temporary custody of our daughter. Just got word that he wants to come back, and move back in like nothing has happened. He is a yellow bellied shit head and I live for the day I see his obituary in the paper. > I idealized you, and, you were not who I thoughtso, fuck youyou wasted my time! So what this artical states and others if a man tries to fight to get his partner back he is a narcissist but if he tries to move on and show no hurt he is also a narcissist. you pick the best symbol. Good luck to you. They say this to control what you do, who you see, and where you go. I wish it was only a dream. She is the only person I ever loved, and ever had a long-term relationship with. I feel its misleading. I AM SO DESPRATE IN NEED OF HELP TO COME OVER ALL I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO I CANT ANYMORE, Great post. Seeing me upset his reaction was Im damned if I do and damned if I dont! Women narcissists are more dangerous and devious than males. Against my better judgement I had to rescind the order to get the divorce. Oh just needed time to think. Really, for anyone out there experiencing the same thing and finding it hard, thinkif they are so happy in themselves and with their lives and the new fantastic girlfriend why are they still getting in touch with you. zombies. I know too well due to my reaction however I used tools to SHOW changes and accountability bcuz la had evidence but after that I was very careful around him but I recorded him used text based evidence by the time he figured it out it was too late I still felt bad but thats bcuz we have empthay Im slowly going to pull his contact away. They cannot stand you giving your attention to anyone (or anything) else, even your children. In the beginning he was happy about our pregnancy. We talk about lot of scientific and pseudo classifications in terms of narcissist-sociopathic inflictions , however we often fail to introspect. I think we need to verbalized in order to heal. She basically left me for her boss. How, if you have and where, and if not, what is going on with you and if you feel as I do. But I removed him from my life, finally. My brother was discarded in a terrible way by his gf. Yeah! Funny you metioned he breaks up but you are not to tell anyone, I thought this only happened to me. My love life turned out to be something great after i contacted great mutaba through his details via email [greatmutaba@ gmail. It has been now 5 years and Im finally at the point were I will not talk to him. Depression and anxiety. 7. When i first heard of him i never believed his powers until i emailed him, after having some conservation with him, he did a spell for me and my ex lover who promise to marry me later came back to apologize to me, today we are happily married. You yield nothing from a N other than grief and heartache. He told me he was 27. A few months later, Ju told me that her relationship with her partner is over and she will be loyal to me I felt somewhere that it was my fault and was abit sad. Intimately related to these exaggerated compensatory mechanisms is a literally anti-social tendency to deceive, devalue, debase, and even show disdain for others. Anyway the next day I said: Im deleting your information. No cure for such souls? LeaveANarc, yes I do understand, though my discard of him just happened. OMG Michele he is pure evil. He was always watching p**n when not at work or when interacting with family and friends. Over time they start to devalue you and in doing so, eliminate your ability to make them feel better about themselves. I want to tell her that she will become exhausted from the cycle; maybe not now, but when she becomes an elder. The porn, the lies, text messages from women he met on these sites with nude pictures attached. He constantly blamed me for everything and to a point where I really believed maybe I was high maintenance. He loved that girl so much, she theater him like shit. Was a perfectionist & obsessed with there body. Weeks. He wants to buy a house and have a life with me. I am still dealing with it due to the inability of No Contact I have learned so much over these years of how damaging the effects are It hurts when the children are also victims.. Ive been divorced for 9 years now Praise the Lord. & when I declined would make statements like you cant fight me & you cant resist me & when I did resist them they would get very nasty & even make threats!! So very thankful that other men responded to this with regaurds to women who are narcissist ! Out of nowhere he surprisingly left me to be with another girl, so i met a friend who gave me this Tel +1 (971)-512-6745) of this spell caster Robinson, he stays in USA, so contacted him because i was so heartbroken and dont know what to do with myself but after 3 days of contacting Mr Robinson , my lover came back to me. A big part of me does not want to break up the family, while I have no confidence that we will work. I could not pay for a private investigator so i decided to confront her myself and ask her about the messages on her computer and like instantly she came out clean but i wished i never asked her because it was like she needed me to see those messages in the first place. These behaviors are mostly unconscious strategies to feel better about themselves, often at others' expense. Especially, if he says nasty things about you or your situation, which him being a narcissist, he probably will. they are fossils now. He loves pegging and porn on methvery rarely would even attempt to satisfy me. Before I went to bed every night I, would send him love, light, and all the warmth I could muster, although, sometimes it was very difficult. But let me first understand if I am a narcissist , sociopaths or a true heart possibly I shall be one of those classified analysis .. what we sow is what we reap and it works vice versa .. we see relationships from the community that goes on for years and years , my question is were u and ur psychopathic narcissist sociopathic boy/girlfriend did not feel love atleast a day and if that was not right what were the chances that had to spend lot of time with the people you blame .. let me point this , if you dont feel the mental compatibility in the beginning of even a small chat or if you dont spend a time together without a kiss for atleast a considerable amount of time and if you still feel the same way you felt when you started off your relationship let be me honest .. dont pretend that you are living on somebodys shoes maybe my partner who broke up with me had a different situation altogether as we have been breaking up for over 10 times in a month . I caved. And claimed that of he doesnt get his way, its going to be big trouble. Thank you well he insists to set them up this clunky phone charger he puts by my bed and this clock by my tv that faces my bed The light from the clock is so bright I start to cover it at night I start getting text hes you using your clock ? I managed to find enough strength to reach out to a neighbour for help. He demanded everything but my needs were optional. Im really upset as what we had was really special and it breaks my heart to know it will end. A few weeks later, we were dating. The circumstances of the breakup, your exs mental health and self-esteem, and your willingness to communicate with the narcissist post-relationship all come into play. We remarried (believe it or not). My phone my emails. But since its been all about him. A narcissist will know everything there is to know about how you feel, and then use your every feeling against you. I couldnt nor did I want to believe it. I told him that I never ever wanted to see him or speak with him again. The desperate attempts are him just trying to fill the void inside him again. They don't want to let you move on, so they'll use your weakness against you. Jack C brings up 2 great points I noticed with my ex. They have all been 40 too. Somehow I want him to come back, not the idealizing fake person he was in the beginning but this sinister asshole I have come to know. We both thought it was a little creepy. I will win in the end. .. I cant let him get his hooks in me again. I started investigating and discovered so many lies and deceit. My heart breaks when i think of all the effort i put into loving a vain guy whod do no effort to keep me. I became a huge blowout among family members and him because they finally realized that he had been lying to them the whole time and had been telling them all different lies and versions of it. I have dealt with deaths easier than this mental/ emotional manslaughter. Best way out after goin back to him 12 times was an avo after he hit me. thinking about you would require some sort of emotional connection or human reaction hes not human. She got herself a boyfriend who rediscovered great sex with her. whilst there i was cook ncleaner and mother to his other two kids. Dating a narcissist can really hurt your self-esteem. I was really convince, I quickly contacted him I explain all my problem to him, he told me that i should not worry that all my problems will be solved immediately. It Kinda hurts but, playing with his head when he is trying to play with mine is fun, like a chess game. "The Casanova doesn't care very deeply for their partner, nor did they expect to have a long-term relationship. Once theyve devalued you enough, they have no further use for you and finally discard you. She may never be happy period. Hey I have to go to Spain. But its so hard and I really dont want to. Listen to me on this , love had never been cheap and never will be its not in the air as we welcome everyone by curiosity as someone should be our one . He just wanted to know what happened and she just ignored him. they tried to bully me into a 5050.and I stood firm in saying. So when I returned he once again stated lashing out, but this this armed with the advise I had, I didnt go back and forth with him. yup. We stopped to dinner on the way and later, I had the best sex I had ever experienced on that little bed in the back cab of the truck. he prevent me from seeing my daughter 4 3 weeks she was 15 months at the time he then filed to courts 4 full custody. The rage, the pure evil and, yes, the vicious slander / character assassination to make him the victim and me the monster and to discredit me to prevent his exposure. he totally love bombed me for the first months. The other, had come over tripping out. I should have RAN. Thankyou for everyones comments i have been the a really difficult time i met a man i loved he put me threw hell i never from one day till the next what he was going to do or say he played me for a fool.. The wound is too deep but whatever the case. You deserve respect and true love!!! What do I get ? I was already getting help for codependency but the more I learn I realized what he was..a monster..he kept me isolated from the world and the autism didnt help it either. I am sad to know people do this and saddened to think I was his victim N it the one he claimed to love. I realized that I deserved so much more and that my staying would eventually cost me my life. He said I wouldnt have to do that with him because he wouldnt stick around where hes not wanted. Half the time,its the women who are the narcs. we have two kids together and we are happy. With me, he was literally just as mad or worse, 14 yrs later, than he was the day I left him! It's easy to assume once the breakup is initiated, your nightmare . Seeking out a professional to guide you through the process is always a good idea. So I Tell him just please get out of my car. After cheating and telling me I make him do it over and over again. At this stage, this is where the issues started to come up. ive a chilminder other days even though hes not working. When I would threaten to leave him, he would try for awhile. I consider her a N Sociopath, and believe me when I say that from my own experience with Ns, My mother is the absolute worst and there is no N man that I know of who could compare to my mothers viciousness and manipulations. Feeling Understood Even More Important Than Feeling Loved? Narcissistic personality disorder to be correct. ? Manipulation is their biggest hobby, so when their victims find their voice and decide enough is enough, a feeling of anger and emptiness washes over them. And I have been begging. And when I confronted him about my findings, I was that ither ungrateful, losing my mind, etc. Imagine my surprise when this fat, short woman shows up at my door! 3. It is possible for them to completely cut you out of their life. On top of all of it, I am without a job and my car does not work so for the past year, Ive been driving one of his cars. less than 6 months after he left. I am here to share my experience with all of you. People with high levels of narcissistic admiration experienced less anxiety and sadness after a breakup and maintained positive perceptions of their exes. Research Shows Why Attractive People Are More Narcissistic, Grieving Twice: Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents, Checklist for Ending a Relationship With a Narcissist. Especially if I have to pay child support. Basically I feel like he will always have a foothold in my life, because of my son, I feel he planned this entire situation strategically, and I feel so lost, alone, and empty that Im deeply afraid that he will use my son to destroy me forever. The love-bombing stage is over. Thats my one way ticket out of the spin . I will heal and move on . He still hasnt gotten over me leaving him, done some very low down rotten things to me..trying to get ppl to think of me as a nothing. I cooked (Im a personal chef), kept his clothes clean and acted as his gofer in the course of his trucking business and he was very generous, never demanding I find full time employment. To pull me back in. The grave misfortune in their decision to safeguard their (actually false) self should by now be obvious; by refusing (or being unable) to open up their heart to others, they prevent themselves from ever getting whatdeep down and totally out of their awarenessthey most desire and desperately need. If you got away and it chases you. Until you have dealt with someone with a NPD, you dont know how these ppl do things..they are not normal! First and foremost, since youre a Catholic, gather up strength and start praying to god to see this through for both you and your son. Strengthen your support network. He destroyed me and my life he disliked my friends and family it was all about him. I can literally say my life is perfect because all i need in my life was my family and i had it back with a stronger love bond. The best way in which to make your intentions known is to be firm, direct, and absolutely clear in establishing your boundaries. Funny smart. I think I fell in love with him that day; I thought I found my knight. He would purpose let me see he was texting someone, in the mean time making sure I was there for him as his trophy, He liked to parade me around and show off to his firefighter friends, jus because I am pretty, young and have a pretty body. Good on you for figuring out a strategy that works in the interim. Severing the lines of communication leaves the narcissist with fewer options for controlling you. Hes basically saying this guy will support him. Regarding the P*********y With all the abuse and trauma weve been through with these horrible relationships is there a reason no one will spell out the word pornography? Which I should. And Im hoping to grasp some sort of understanding, and advice, Hi Take your son and keep strong.Do as much research on narcissistic personality disorder as you can.As you will be co parenting limit all contact with your sons father.Please dont let this narc destroy you.You will if you give your son up for adoption.May I suggest you google Melanie tonia evans? He was talented photographer very handsome. 5. Leaving is hard but it can be done. Ive been trying to leave for years now & he refuses to accept it, trying the Lets be friends, then treats me like were still in a relationship & controls, disrespects & is so ignorant, its worse than ever before. Narcissists never go quietly into the night. A version of you thats not at all close to who you really are. But their deeper insecurities are yet discernible in their so often fishing for compliments. i have work hard and tried everything i could to get my lover back but nothing works out for me to get him back, till i came across a great man profile called Dr.Kasee a love spell caster that helped me get my lover back to me wethin the period of 2days i want to say with his great power he has save so many lifes and relationship he was the only man i contacted and his magic really brought my ex back for in case you need his help for your relationship to be restored you can email him [email protected].